Sunday, December 04, 2005
LOUD DEEP LONG SIGH* mummy, tell me whats' on your mind will you?
sleepless nights.
when im out, i worry.
anxiety.
more anxiety.
and more anxiety.
please tell me what should i do?
- PAULFRANK__
Thursday, December 01, 2005
i had so much fun during training today. :D it was a little tiring, but i tink the chong ghee feeling's coming back. step by step, slowly. thanks everyone! and for the encouragement. i LOVE IT! in e morning went to the pool for awhile only. then home, then training. FUN!
tmmr's the gym! then bring ervyn to get his haircut. that little boy. first time he's going to a salon. well, all along it was the barber's for him. so he didnt know where to go, so yeap. hopefully bball in e evening. oh man, i stink! this entry wont be long. saturday, NATIONAL YOUTH TRANING. oh what the heck. im speechless about that. some of you know why. but its okay. i'll still train, but not in hope for something, anything. just a fitter and stronger me. :D thats the way, gwen. then evening, what should i do. wee. that depends, spend time with mummys! good idea.
ohoh, im so excited. im gonna learn GOLF! how exciting. okay lah. but im learng it with my brother, AND HIS FIENDS! feels a little weird though. but its okay lah i guess. kor, dont leave me out, cries* hmm. the exciting thing is actually YOGA and KICKBOXING at amore fitness. luckily, im sixteen. :D student package. evil laughs* well with all these, and i just startd GYM like two days ago. hopefully, i'll be fitter.
so wish i could work at CHECKS! but they're looking for full time people. damn! but its okays. gonna work event coordinator with bird they all. 30 bucks a day. :D my first PAY! my first JOB. not really official. but STILL. dear, u haf the previlage of my first pay. I INSIST. :D lalalalas. oh gawh, im meetg QIAN MUMMY and BAOZHEN soon. i missed them. weee.
well i really stink. END! :D
wait, dear. come back quick, i'll be so talkative. and u will be right. thanks for the sweets. :D ill definitely love them. i miss you loads. though im quite busy while your away, but i miss you! come back. safe and sound, in a piece. hope u grow fatter. hahaha, what? what a weird hope. u better not be skinner. i promise you good food when u come back. :D come home soon. anyways, marlow and marshmallow's been great. so sad, my friends saw lao turtle and they said it was evil and it looked ALIEN! how could they. i love him,its okay. wait, HER? whatever lahs. TWO MORE DAYS. i pray that u met many many many FRIENDS, learn LOTSA THINGS, no injuries, happy days. i bet you'll come home stronger, greater, AND EVERYTHING POSITIVE.
love you. :D
- PAULFRANK__
Sunday, November 20, 2005
my tailbone's hurt. how? guess i'll go see a doctor but. BUT! argh, oh wells. ahaas. its quite miserable having to sit and stand and walk with the pain! i shouldnt whine so much. but still. cant tink too much of it rights? mr ng's going away. 10days, gone. come back for 2days and he's gone again. cries* i'll miss you my dear. i'll promise to take care of myself, u too? remember the emergency chocolate i gave you. ((((: hope it helps. haha, abit lame though, but nyhehehe. when ur away, i'll be playg the seven eleven cup, three on threes, etc. i'll try not to give up alrights. ur words are somewhere floating arouund me already. err. yes! i'll wait for you to come back then i whine to you alrights. you little naughty boy, please DRINK gallons of water, stares* and eat as much as you can. suprise suprise on the day that you leave, hehs. i'll make sure i'll enjoy myself. while your there, you musnt give up okays, DO YOUR BEST. remember the little booklet they gave you that day, remember those words in there. i'll promise to miss you. its not a promise, well. more like its in me already. im startg to miss you of course. we'll spend 17th together, and xmas. we wont be deprived of these two special days! exams are over soon, and what should i do these holidays. irving's asking me to learn how to drive a motor boat ! so excited. my australia's trip with chern hui could be cancelled. :( but its okay lahs, we might get to go tioman and etc. year's ending, days in guangyang's ending. all those memories. hails* ken and angela's leaving. cries* ken for thai then china to study, angela, hong kong! luanjinda thanasan! i will remember you, the sensible talks you gave me at times. hahahhs, i know your secrets pretty. aahahhas. evil smile* rugby with the class. SCREAMS! we won all the rugby matches at inter class competition. even basketball, floorball, captain's ball. i love you all. ahahhs, sorry about the markers fetish i had. i drew stuff on your hands and books, anyhow scribbled everything through. my bestest memories with 4E3! we must go invade chomp chomp again. and we must find fields to tackle each other again, and DIG ALL THE MUD,ahhahahahs. patches of holes in the fields. wee* and ms joey tan, thank you! mr ng, take care of yourself while your there.
- PAULFRANK__
Monday, October 10, 2005
i had a bad day though. but it ended well. thanks to aunty* well, i cried myself to sleep again, i've sinned, im not supposed to do that ah. right right, hmmm. sorry aunty* i remember my promise but you knows. and i just felt everything overpouring me. i was at lost, what shoould i do? yes, i dont know how to handle stress well as usual, al i knew was. GO SLEEP, GWEN! haha. 31 more days, and soon it'll be 13. gee, time flies really past, will i cheat myself again, or would i be crying because i have results ranged from 1s to 3s? its a good question. i've started to slack again. i cant. sigh. nvm, i must jiayous! like what aunty* aways tells me. thanks aunty for always being patient. thanks for you being around always.*God, please bless aunty's* ulcers, they are really bad.
- PAULFRANK__
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
studies have showed that gwen's a sadist.
hanbin knows it all.days been great. but have been short tempered and demanding! hmm. its okays. i'll blog some other time. i gotta study! heh heh. maths maths here i come!
- PAULFRANK__
Wednesday, August 31, 2005
it was just a SUPERB day.how silly of me. telling someone how i feel was just as simple as ABC. agree? nods* i used to think it was hard. VERY hard indeed. but now. not at all. thanks dear, thanks friends. thanks everyone. all of you, whom i live for. thanks for being understanding always. dear, thanks for being there always. nothing's impossible. EVERYTHING's POSSIBLE! smiles* i apologise too, for being so serious and, so demanding. i shouldnt get angry over this, sorry. smiles* forgive me please? dear, forgive me too? it was a hard time to pass by. there's nothing wrong with me. but if there is, do say. i'll take it in a different stride. thanks for everything, everyone.greatest thanks to dear and cherlyn. FRIENDS too! everyone. (((((: it really feels better saying things out. i really felt so much better. it took me sucha long time to realise that it was just so simple. thanks to all, i realise it now. now, i haf another problem.how do i express all my thanks to all of you.grins*
- PAULFRANK__
Saturday, August 27, 2005
if your nice, help me. if your not nice, SHUT UP.i had a great great day. ((((: summarised*
people around me. please dont stop me from climbing my way up. stop mouthing to me that i'm what what what. u know something, it does matter. but please question yourself first before you comment about me. ask yourself whether you understand me enough to mouth something about me. as i am trying very hard, this dumb comments can pull me down. before you say something about even, ask yourself why i am like that. if you can answer this question. then come tell me. tell me if you have the good intention of wanting me to change. not just to bullshit about me. if you want to help me to change me, tell me the reason. if you dont intend to, and you just want to give me a nasty comment. keep your mouth shut. anyone in the right mind who know that if someone has so low self esteem and so stressed and uptight would know that they'll be heard if they tell them such nasty comments. understand? imagine if one day your just so tired, but your face writes, im pissed. how will you feel? you'll feel that you're wronged isnt it. thats how i feel. and for goodness sake, please think before you say anything. i know some of you have good intentions, but please lah. phrase it in a nicer way can. and people, STOP calling me autistic. if i was, i would be one of those kids that suffers from hundreds of needles at the chinese sinseh every weekend. do you know that autistic people go through lots of pain. its not funny or anything. wait till u see a small little autistic kid cry when hundreds of needles are peirced in. and obviously i dont go through that, so screw it. dont call me autistic. yes, i have problems with expressing myself, then help me. tell me how to express myself better. rather than just calling me autistic. help me to change, not help me to give up okay. thanks for everyone who have been trying to help me.
i guess its only my dear. no more words of sorry rights? i must be a happy girl. and i will be. thanks for always going all out. and remember, your comments matter most to me. cos you understand me, you know whats wrong. it DOES MATTER, don tink it doesnt har. thanks for everything. I AM A SOON-TO-BE HAPPY GIRL.
- PAULFRANK__
